The_catoptric_problem.html
The problem with mirrors is that they don't show what you actually look like – they're flipped. And so, when you look at a photo of yourself, you might feel weird about it, because you're not used to seeing yourself this way, you're used to seeing yourself flipped. Well, I don't, because I avoid both mirrors and photos of myself.
I bring this up, of course, because I want to use mirrors as a metaphor.
I write poetry from time to time, and a majority of the time, when I write poetry, it’s primarily self-reflective. Some other non-poetry works of mine are such as well, I suppose, but for poetry there’s a very limited number of works I’ve made that aren’t self reflective. Recently, I’ve felt that these self-reflective works are like a mirror. Except they’re worse than normal mirrors, because I construct them myself, with all the imperfections and biases that may come from that.
So what then comes from repeatedly looking into such mirrors? Inevitably, my perception of myself will become skewed towards the image in the mirror. And so, the next mirror will be constructed to reflect this image, becoming skewed further. And in this way, what was meant to be an act of self-reflection starts to change me. And really, I felt, this doesn’t just apply to writing poetry, but indeed to any kind of self-reflection.
There’s a concept in physics called the observer effect. It refers to situations where the act of observing something changes it. This is very popular in relation to quantum physics, where the act of observing the quantum phenomenon may change its outcome. This is what I also think is the issue with self-reflection. The act of observing yourself in this way inevitably alters you.
I had this thought for a while, in fact I’ve even written a few poems specifically about this (though I’m not sure others understood them the same way.) This feels problematic, because then, what is the point of self-reflections? May it not even be considered almost harmful? For example, may I not, by noticing negative traits upon self-reflection, actually end up exaggerating them in a sense? Putting on a mask, so that my self-reflection is correct?
Well, I had a realization recently, that changes my view on this. See, it seems to me that I assumed that a person is, or at least, should be static. But, of course, that is not the case, not in the slightest. It should then be absolutely expected that the act of self-reflection will change me, as any other act will as well. And now, realizing that this is no different from any other act, it is clear to see that the result is not in any way “inauthentic”, as otherwise one would have to assume that the only “authentic” form of themselves is the way they were when they were born.
Additionally, perhaps it is worth kind of… Extending my mirror metaphor a bit further. Let’s say, that as I’ve suggested before, I notice some kind of trait in my self-reflection, and that causes me to exaggerate it. Well, first off, how can I be so sure that that’s what’s happening? Have I not, perhaps, simply polished a part of the mirror, such that now I notice more easily something that was before hidden? And furthermore, perhaps I should actually ask myself, what does this change mean? Because it would seem that not every such act of self-reflection would result in this. So perhaps I simply need to reflect on why this aspect specifically would be “exaggerated’. This realization, I think, might be very important for me.
(Sidenote: In context of the part about the observer effect, it is worth noting that “observing” here really means “detecting” or “measuring”, as far as I’m aware. In the double-slit experiment, for example, one of the most famous experiments to show this effect in quantum physics, the change in the behavior of the electrons occurred specifically when electronic detectors have been placed at the slits. I’m no quantum physicist, so what I’m saying may not be entirely accurate, but our experiments don’t in any way seem to suggest, as far as I’m aware, that a conscious observer or the like can affect these quantum phenomena. Thought it’s worth mentioning, as this is something that always bugged me when I heard about quantum physics, as it was always using the word “observer” as if humans looking at a thing could somehow change it.)